But. The past two years or so? I'm not sure what triggered it, but I can't seem to get enough of yummy-smelling things. Lotions, shower gels, bath bombs, bubble bars, SCRUBS (face and body -- my latest addiction), bath pillows, etc etc etc. Out. Of. Control. And since the post-being-laid-off feeling has evidently lifted, it's gotten really bad. Plus I'm a member of this beauty board and I can spend HOURS reading what people are saying about new products, which products suck, which ones rock, when the SALES are, etc etc. It's insane. I admit it. The irony is probably that I don't even have a boyfriend or any kind of SO to appreciate how f***ing FABULOUS I smell all the time.
So I told Babs that I was addicted to bath products (which I'm sure she already knew) and that in fact, if someone offered me ice cream or a bath bomb? I'd take the bath bomb. No question. Food or bathing decadence? Bathing decadence. As I thought about it, it occurred to me that this could be a BRILLIANT diet, if I could figure out how to work it; y'know??? But the secondary problem is that I seriously need to go on a bath and body diet, as well. I have a "stash" I have built up, slowly, and it's a little...um...huge. Lotions? I probably have 20 I haven't even OPENED yet, not to mention the 14 on my bedside table (ask Nicole, she saw it). Scrubs? More than 20, I'll bet. I never have less than 6 shower gels at one time in my shower, and there are SCORES more unopened. I have two shampoos right now, which is low for the moment, and have narrowed it down to one conditioner. But the point is, no way in my life can I ever hope to use all this up. If I stopped buying stuff today, I'd be set for life, i'm pretty sure. Luckily this stuff has a shelf life, so I'm forced to purge ever so often... but then? The horrible, debilitating GUILT at the waste.
Occasionally I put together little goodie bags for family and friends, but not often enough. It's really hard to get rid of things because I only buy really great stuff, and I love it all. I would marry it all. If I could.
So. Not sure how to start the food diet thing, as that is an ongoing challenge for me, but the B&B diet is much more clear. Starting today? I am not buying another product until at LEAST the fall. This summer i'm going to work very, very hard to use stuff up and give things away as I become detached. I am going to smell so damn good that bees will follow me everywhere and Jess will build a nest in and live in my hair. I will be the cleanest girl in Austin. No, in the Land!
Please, good man, if you're out there? Follow that wonderful smell and ASK ME OUT, will you??