Showing posts with label Spring Canyon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Spring Canyon. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Rekindling my Colorado spirit

I have been in a weird emotional place lately. I think it's because it is summertime, which for the past 20 years has been my least favorite season, and now that I'm here and there's not mind-numbing heat, I'm able to focus on and remember the years in which it was actually my favorite time of the year. I've talked about Spring Canyon before, but I hadn't really thought about it in a long time. Like, since I've moved here, really. Which is insane. That place and those people had such a profound effect on me, changing who I was and how I thought about myself. I honestly don't know if I would have survived high school if not for my yearly escape to the mountains.

So imagine my surprise when I was driving toward the mountains last week, on my way home from visiting the nephews in south Denver, feeling kind of moody and a little bit lonely; wondering when this place would feel like home; and then SHAZAAM, the realization that um, I have felt at home here before, and I'll bet if I looked around a little bit, I could even reconnect with some of the dear people I knew so well 20 (gulp) years ago. In other words, HELLO, Spring Canyon is only a couple of hours away!!! And a handful of the people I befriended there were from Denver, so I'll bet I could get on google and dig up at least some of them. It's so bizarre to me how that epiphany, a) took so long to happen, and b) made me instantly think of Denver differently; not as a giant, foreign city to conquer, but as somewhere where I had very happy memories when I was much, much younger.

So, note to self: begin excavation Spring Canyon. Before the summer is gone. I'd love to drive up there for a weekend and see if anyone I know still works there. I would love it even more if my dear friend Kelly, the only person I am still close to who understands and remembers that time, could explore it with me. KJ, that is a not-so-subtle nudge to get up here :)

I'm thinking a roadtrip is in order... I don't know about you, but I definitely need to reconnect with that other Lisa, the one who could laugh with her whole body, love with her whole soul, and truly escape the troubles of everyday life, if only for a few weeks a year. I live here now - I'm thinking I should work on making that carefree, optimistic attitude more of an everyday thing.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Why Colorado?

It occurred to me that the 80 frillion strangers faithfully reading my blog every day might not know why I'm so drawn to Colorado. Obviously, my nephews are there, but me and Colorado go way back. Me and Colorado are old friends.

It all started back in the late 70s, when my family went to Spring Canyon for our summer vacation. Spring Canyon was/is a retreat-type place run by OCF -- Officer's Christian Fellowship. It was/is a beautiful, rustic, friendly and affordable vacation spot for those in the military and their families. For two summers, we went there, and I fell in love. Those two weeks, one each summer, affected me greatly and I truly believe that's where my wanderlust began. Being an army brat anyway, I already wasn't afraid of living in different places, but CO might be somewhere I would choose to go on my own someday. Tucked into the Rocky Mountains and neighboring a small town appropriately called Buena Vista, Spring Canyon was the most beautiful place I had ever seen. I also made several friends I would connect with again in later years.

Here's the deal: Spring Canyon is kept clean and orderly by a volunteer staff of teenagers from all over the world. In exchange for free room and board, they would rotate several groups of 16-20 teens throughout the summer, teens who got the "camp" experience without the yucky tents and stuff :) The food was home-cooked, and part of the support staff's job was to help in the kitchen and serve meals. We had a few hours of downtime each day where we could do our own thing, and even one day off a week where we didn't have to work at all.

Ok, I already gave it away with the "we" -- as soon as I was old enough, 15, I applied and was accepted as a staff member during the summer between my freshman and sophomore year of high school. Knowing I had this to look forward to helped me make it through some rough boyfriend moments that year in school. I couldn't wait to go and experience my first real bout with independence in a "safe" venue. As expected,I loved it. I was there for a 5-week stint, which was the longest I'd ever been away from family. I missed them, but also discovered how good it is to miss something sometimes, so you appreciate it more when you return. I made lifelong friends that summer and even had a mini (very mini) romance with one of the guests. This was against the rules and scandalous, but hey -- what did they expect with a bunch of teenagers and pretty mountains? It was very innocent, but it was enough to make my boyfriend back home jealous and actually shape up for a month or so before deteriorating back to asshole-status. But I digress.

The second summer I went was for 6 weeks. I was 16, a little older and wiser, and embraced the whole experience with joy and no fear of the unknown. This was the summer I truly came into my own. I found I wasn't that "shy" after all -- the label I'd always had in school was not true, much to my surprise. I felt popular for the first time in my post-elementary-school life, but we were such a close-knit group that there were no "outsiders", unlike "real life". Spring Canyon was an amazing, life-altering escape from reality, which was something I really needed. It was a little pocket in time where I could laugh til I cried and be myself and feel spiritual, stuff I was too tied in knots to do at home during the rest of the year. And the second summer, I had a summer romance. His name was Marshall and he was the first soccer player I would be involved with (in an ongoing stream of soccer players...heh). We were 16, beautiful, filled with the magic of the place, surrounded by people we liked and respected, and we fell in love. I still had my boyfriend back home, but what a difference it made to finally have a comparison. Marshall made Chris's faults all the more hideous, and I came back that summer not quite as susceptible to his bullshit. Marshall and I wrote tons of letters that year and called each other once a week, taking turns. He lived in North Carolina. We finnagled and prayed and crossed our fingers and toes, and somehow ended up on the same staff for our third summer.

The third summer. I was gone a full 7 weeks this time, because I went up early and stayed late with my friend Kelly at her home in Co. Springs. In between was the joy, the drama, the heartbreak, the strength, and more dear friends. Every year it was harder to go home to my blah life in San Antonio and my disappointing boyfriend. Things in Texas just weren't as shiny as in Colorado. My friends in CO "got" me. I didn't think most of my friends in TX "got" me. Of course Marshall and I had a disastrous and dramatic breakup within our first couple days together, but I learned how to concede with grace that summer. It was painful, yes, but my heart had already been ripped into bloody shreds by my h.s. sweetheart, so it was not unbearable. Even when Marshall paired off with another girl on staff, Becky, I couldn't be mad at her because she was so awesome and I loved her so much. Plus, I knew they didn't have the same spark we had the previous summer. The point is, I didn't freak out and it didn't ruin my trip, like it might have two years prior. I had grown, as a person and as a friend. I left my third summer at Spring Canyon to return to TX for my senior year, which is a whole novel in itself.

Every summer in CO, I became more convinced that I felt more myself there, that I felt more at home, more comfy, more at peace. I could hear myself think there. And the mountains made me feel closer to all that is good in the world. I continued flirting with Colorado during college, when I would go home with my friend Kelly for Spring Breaks. Yes, the one from Spring Canyon, who lived in Co. Springs. She ended up being my roommate in college for a couple of years.

When I met who would become my husband (then ex-husband), I was very clear with him that I had no intention of staying in TX forever. That I was biding my time until I could move back to CO. He would laugh and roll his eyes and pat me on the head, like "silly lisa, whatever you say..." It wasn't until we were married that I realized he had no intention of ever leaving Texas.

In fact, I had a job opportunity AT Spring Canyon right after I graduated from college -- but I chose to stay in Texas because my ex and I were supposed to get engaged. I chose him over my true love. Live and learn.

When my sis and her family moved to Denver last summer, it was bittersweet. I was sad they wouldn't be nearby anymore, but at the same time, I was excited they'd be in one of my favorite places on earth. And in the back of my mind, I was thinking "hmmm....." I would tell people "well if something were to happen with my job, who knows...". Well, people, that something happened and I have a promising job lead in Denver -- and THAT'S Why Colorado.

As afraid as I am to uproot the life I've built here in Austin, all my dear friends, my career contacts, my sense of "home", I am just as excited to start fresh somewhere else. And not just any somewhere...but Colorado.

So. We shall see.